How often do you notice beating yourself up? In the midst of intense anxiety or other negative emotions, does your mind berate you even being in this situation? Intense negative emotions trigger a powerful instinct to escape. This frantic need for escape, can often take the form of self-criticism, which only intensifies the fire of our anxiety. We desperately seek control, but our efforts often backfire, leaving us feeling more trapped and defeated.
Self-Compassion vs. God's Compassion
Other therapists, may talk about the concept of self-compassion. The leading proponent of self compassion, Kristin Neff says:
While Neff's defintion and resources are helpful, if I am honest, I often find it hard to apply in the throes of anxiety. My brain says, maybe it is ok for others to struggle, but its not ok for me! I'm drowning! Self-compassion feels too slow, too gentle. I need want out!
Thankfully, the Bible teaches something a bit different than self-compassion as a means of dealing with our anxiety as Christians. Scripture teaches that we were designed to receive compassion, not manufacture it ourselves. That's why a friend's kind word, presence or gesture can be so transformative in the midst of emotional pain.
Ultimately, the most lasting and powerful source of compassion is God himself. He offers a lifeline when our own reserves of strength and compassion run dry.He is far more patient and gracious with us, than we are with ourselves. And therefore, we have a far more powerful source to draw compassion from than our own well of self-compassion.
Psalm 103: A Father's Love
One Psalm I turn to when I am feeling anxious, weary and full of condemnation is Psalm 103. David's Psalm is a beautiful reminder of God's steadfast love, forgiveness, and faithfulness. In particular, verses 13-14 bring comfort and soothe my embattled soul:
"As a father shows compassion to his children, so the Lord shows compassion to those who fear him. For he knows our frame; he remembers that we are dust."
What picture do these words paint?
The first image, of a compassionate father, causes my own soul take relax and take a breath. I see a father who is both wise and tender. He understands the fears that keep me up at night, the doubts that whisper in my ear, and the anxieties that grip my heart. I can tell Him anything. I can trust Him. He acts in ways that communicate love and care. He answers my childish questions, and loves me for who I am. He recognizes my neediness for his care, and He is patient and kind. When I rightly fear Him, I am not puffed up in my own ability to care for myself, but I am reliant as a child is on their earth father to love and care for them.
The second image, of a frame made of dust reminds me of the truth that I am God's created being. Made of lowly and humble material. I communicates the reality that I was not created to do all things, know all things, or achieve perfection. And isn't that good news! I don't have to be perfect, I can accept my limitations, as He does, and trust the Creator, to be in charge. He remembers our limitations, and so can we.
Moving Forward in Grace:
Living with OCD is incredibly tough. The constant flood of anxiety, the intrusive thoughts, the overwhelming urges—it's a battle you never chose. If you could simply choose to be confident and anxiety-free, you would. In the short term, compulsions offer an escape from the intensity of those feelings. Breaking free is possible, but not easy. It requires risk, and discernment that may take time to develop and take root.
Instead of berating yourself for having OCD, direct that energy towards accepting it. Perfection is not the goal; growing in grace is. Your Heavenly Father knows your battle. He sees your struggles, and your weaknesses. He is with you in the midst of the storm extending his arms of compassion and grace.
Here are some specific ways that you as a Christian struggling with anxiety and OCD can tap into God's compassion for you:
Meditate on Psalm 103: You can meditate on scripture in a number of ways:
Read it slowly, repetitively over the next days and weeks, maybe even the next year.
Copy it
Write down the phrases that resonate with you most.
Memorize parts or all of it
Practice Mindfulness: When anxiety strikes, take a deep breath and notice your thoughts and feelings without judgment. Acknowlege them to yourself, to God and maybe to a friend or loved one.
Pray: Pray back the words of the Psalm:
Lord, you are a loving and gracious Father.
You have compassion for me.
I am your child.
Thank you that you know my frame.
That you remind me that I am dust.
Forgive me for my prideful view of myself; that thinks I should be perfect.
Thank you that help me see myself rightly.
And may your love, compassion, truth, and thoughts of me quiet my own judgmental ones.
May your presence, power and care for me give me peace and strength to accept this hard moment.
Comments